Staff Party
by Koalagriton
Summary: Set within Turtle-Sketches' AU (Mikey and May are married and have a daughter - Mabel) A human Mikey AU. Mikey is turned human in an accident and while Don searches for a cure he decides to do all the human things he's always wanted. Accompanying May to a Staff Party at her work is one of them.
"Maybe I could call to tell them something came up and we can stay at home and watch Netflix or something?" May suggested as they rounded the corner, approaching the child care centre where she worked, slowing her pace as she reconsidered her options.

"What? Why?!" Mikey asked as he failed to reign in his excitement. "But I've never been able to come to one of these parties with you!"

"They're not all that great." May admitted. "Can barely be called a party at all. It's just a boring work... thing to socialise and gossip, mostly. It's almost like a long coffee break but everyone's there at the same time and you're kind of forced to interact with everybody, even the people you don't like much."

"Sounds amazing!" Michelangelo answered, barely listening or containing himself as he pulled her along like a puppy dragging their owner down the pavement by their leash.

May sighed and rolled her eyes letting herself be towed up the incline leading to their destination. There was no stopping Mikey when he got like this, his mind would not veer from the goal in sight once it got into his head and even though she knew he would ultimately be disappointed and agree with her that they should take advantage of a child-free evening, she couldn't take this away from him.

It was only recently that an unfortunate accident involving some kind of coloured ooze had changed her turtle husband into a human. Donatello was working non-stop on a way to reverse it but they understood that it would be something that would take time. Afraid that the change was only temporary or unstable at first, Mikey had stayed at the lair under Donatello's close supervision but once they realised it was permanent Michelangelo became determined to squeeze as many experiences from this as possible for the time he was granted.

The trimonthly staff party was one of those experiences he was determined to have. This was the same party she had to force herself to go to every three months. It wasn't that she hated it, there were some people from work she really got along with and could even call friends but there were others who were just... not. The fact that some turned it into an excuse to poke into personal lives when she was so defensive about her own secret mutant family might have had something to do with her apprehension. It just didn't feel like a good idea when it was just a matter of time that her husband would become a close-guarded secret again. Plus, some of the ladies there were kind of judgy and mean and she felt she needed to protect Mikey from that sort of thing.

Of course there was the chance that he would charm everyone with his presence and turn this chore into an enjoyable evening because that was just the way he was. May smiled at the thought just as Mikey glanced at her curiously over his shoulder making his own grin widen, showing all his teeth and finally convincing herself this was a very possible option.

Once they were at the party and introductions were exchanged she felt extremely proud at how polite and casual Michelangelo acted under the attention, the poorly concealed stares and scrutiny he was under. He was a natural social butterfly and she felt herself finally relax enough to try to enjoy her time with a couple of her friends chatting amiably with them in a corner over some oddly tasting fruit punch someone had brought to the event.

Michelangelo quickly grew bored of the conversation once it moved past stories about unruly children and the amount of havoc they could manage in only a few unsupervised seconds. His attention was all over the place, he was ecstatic about the mere fact of just being there as if it were the most normal thing ever. It felt as if he were playing the biggest prank on humanity and... well... PARTY!

It wasn't exactly what he'd pictured a party would be but he didn't let that thought bring him down. It was true that there should be more colourful things pinned up to the walls and ceilings, right? Maybe banners and party hats. How can you have a party without the appropriate head-wear? At least there were a ton of snacks and he piled a plate full of every kind and even a cup of the strange purplish pink water.

"Well, now we know why May was keeping you all to herself." A feminine voice made him turn around quickly, feeling he'd been caught doing something wrong and having to correct his trajectory to not spill his plunder.

He eyed the bright red-haired woman carefully but she was just standing there with another blonde lady smiling at him. Realising he wasn't in any immediate trouble he relaxed somewhat and smiled sheepishly in return, not really understanding what the woman was implying. Had he been acting strangely? Was he giving himself away? He didn't really know what humans did at these kinds of events but he figured there was a lot of food, right? Sooo... eating was a good idea, wasn't it? Maybe he took an inhuman amount of food and was being rude or something?

He nervously eyed May in case she was angry at him and could hint at anything he was doing wrong but she was just talking with her friends, smiling back at him when she caught his look across the room before continuing with her conversation. It was a sure sign that everything was okay, the last of his unease fading away as he returned the smile. After a moment's thought he placed a stack of his pilfered sandwiches back just in case.

 _Don't go anywhere, I'll be back for you later_ , he thought to himself as he mentally said goodbye to them.

When he turned back around the ladies were still there smiling expectantly at him and he nearly jumped. Had they asked him something? He couldn't remember. Man, that red hair was super bright. It was even brighter than April's and he thought she had the reddest (raddest?) hair in the world. Would it be rude to say so? Was he staring?

"Uh..." He started uncertainly and decided to just go for polite conversation. "Janice aaand... Deborah, was it?" He motioned to each one with a brownie he was dying to taste.

"Please, call me Deb." The blonde one immediately answered holding out her hand making him stop and stare at it with the brownie practically at its destination and his mouth half open.

He regretfully put it on the plate, brushed the crumbs off on his jeans and shook the offered appendage. He internally winced at what he'd just done, hoping he hadn't just smeared chocolate on the new clothing. He had to admit he was not a fan of jeans. There were few things he'd ever experienced that felt more uncomfortable and restrictive against his skin but a few choice words from May about what she'd like to do to him when she saw him in them had him sashaying around in the new garment taking special care to lean forward in her view, or reach.

He shook Janice's hand too while he was at it, getting that out of the way so he'd be free to devour the delicious chocolate brownie that had been waiting too long to meet its fate.

"Oh! That's quite a grip you have there, Michelangelo." Janice answered.

He chewed quickly and swallowed. "Call me Mikey." He answered with a grin. "Michelangelo can be a mouthful."

"I'm sure it can." She answered with a knowing smile and he didn't really know what she meant but he guessed it was something nice. "Oh! Honey, you've got some chocolate on..." She gestured vaguely and he wiped at his face with the back of his hand. "Nope, no, still there. Hold on let me..."

Mikey stilled as Janice wiped the edge of his lips with the corner of a paper napkin, the gesture making him more uncomfortable than he thought he should be. He wasn't really sure why. Maybe she was just standing too close and he wasn't used to human strangers he'd just met touching him so casually. He brushed the idea away and thanked the woman.

"Sorry, I just really like chocolate." He admitted with a shy smile.

"Don't we all!" Deb commented light-heartedly, pulling Janice back a bit to stand at her side again.

They had a two second conversation with their eyes that went completely over Mikey's head before Janice continued. "Who knew that under that green foam head there was such a cutie hiding. I never noticed when you used to come by in that costume but you must workout a lot!"

Michelangelo nearly dropped his plate of food when she finished the sentence squeezing his bicep and had to snap his mouth shut to stop the nervous laughter that erupted from him. "HAH! Heh heh, I uh, well, I used to train every day but with Mabel and all I only have time to do that a couple times a week now so I'm not in uh... the same shape as I uhm, used to be."

He congratulated himself at the almost stutter-free delivery. These women were only trying to be kind to him, women in the romantic comedies he saw would always compliment each other, right? He should probably look for something nice to say in return about her. He eyed her quickly. They were pretty, he guessed, in a sort of big hair, leopard print sort of way. He wasn't really an expert and he floundered as he fished in his head for something to say in return.

"I like your hair it's uhm..." Red like the angry bird. "-very..." like a fire hydrant, a ripe tomato, Magikarp, Raph's bike, "-r-red."

"Well aren't you sweet. You like it? I do it myself." She preened and Mikey mentally high-fived himself as he nodded. "Anyway, tell us more about you. How did you and May end up together?"

"Oh! Well, I thought you knew. I was the Cowabunga Carl guy and..." He began to explain.

"Yes, we heard how you met." Deb interrupted. "Everyone here has heard about May having a baby with the mystery man in the frog costume. We meant how you ended up with her."

Mikey looked between them confused. "I don't understand..."

"I mean, you two are so different, you know?" Janice explained.

Michelangelo froze. Was it that obvious he was different? What was he doing wrong? He found his eyes darting down quickly to his hands to make certain that his skin wasn't changing back to green and he still had five fingers.

Both women misunderstood his apprehension and Janice lifted her hands in a placating manner. "Oh, honey, I don't mean anything by it but you know, you two don't really match at first glance. I mean you're obviously into sports and a healthy lifestyle and May, well... How do you manage when you are so different?"

As comprehension of what the women were saying dawned on him, Mikey's expression grew darker making the woman's rambling come to an uneasy stop. They stood there in silence for a few uncomfortable seconds until Michelangelo spoke up, his cheerful demeanour long gone and his voice low and serious. "What do you mean _exactly_?"

"Oh, no, no. I didn't mean... I only meant it as a compliment to you. I mean that you're so cute and fit that you could have literally picked anyone you wanted." She hurriedly added, digging the hole much deeper and no longer able to maintain eye contact with him.

"I did." He answered in that same tone that said: I dare you, I double-dare you to say that one more time.

Janice gave her friend a puzzled, helpless look and whispered, "What did I say?" To her even though Mikey was still standing right there.

Deborah, who had been growing more and more flustered as Janice continued the conversation quickly pulled her friend away with a muttered apology and something about Janice spiking her fruit punch. Mikey watched them walk away and then turned, picked up his previously discarded stack of sandwiches, added a few more brownies to the dangerously unbalanced plate and quickly walked over to May.

"Everything okay?" May asked him when she realised he'd been standing silently beside her for a while.

"Hmmm? Oh, yeah, was just talking over there with Magikarp and Leopard-print." He shrugged, still a bit annoyed about their conversation as he munched on his sandwiches that he'd added brownies to the filling.

The dark skinned older woman May was talking to guffawed unabashedly and Mikey couldn't help but grin at having provoked such a response. "Janice and Deb," The woman shook her head as she spoke. "I swear those two would poison themselves by biting their own tongue."

May looked worriedly at Mikey and he decided he'd had enough of staff parties. "Babe, we really need to start heading home, you know the babysitter couldn't stay much longer."

She searched his eyes for a moment but quickly went along with it. "I didn't realise it was so late!" She exclaimed, looking at her watch before bolting out of there.

"Is everything really okay?" She asked again on the way home.

"I was thinking, why talk to the mean girls when we could Netflix and chill?" He answered with a shrug and a sly smile. She laughed at his eyebrow waggle and his sexy smile warped into his silly one in response to the sorted laughter coming from his wife. "What?! I happen to know these jeans make my ass look fine and I know a lady who promised to do _unspeakable_ things to me if I kept wearing them."

Michelangelo yelped when his bum was firmly pinched in retribution for his shameless hip wiggle as he walked down the street. "Lets get you home and out of them, then." May answered with an appreciative hum as she slipped an arm around his waist and pressed herself against him.

If given a choice between May and any other woman on this planet Michelangelo knew with absolute certainty, as he tucked his wife into his side, that he would pick May every single time.

May shifted slightly against him and he loosened his grip so she could get more comfortable and let her hands wander as much as they wanted. "Mikey?"

"Hmmm?" He answered half dazed, thinking about what would probably happen to him once they arrived home.

"Please tell me that's chocolate smeared against the back of your jeans."


End file.
